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9/07/04
Damn...I'm INCREDIBLY fucking busy...deadlines...Ebay horsecrap..unanswered email...the answering machine blinking away loaded with messages that will compound my juggling act..important shows coming up..work that needs to be done for when company is in town...packing and hauling crap to the post office in a timely fashion...time to feel guilty about not keeping in touch with people..especially my "new" relatives..and sometime most days I've got to find time to write or revise or just bloody think things out or there's no point going on with all the mundane crap.
And of course I've got to find time make trips to my various sources to find stuff to peddle on Ebay. I made a big run today to Austin. I know it sounds like a cakewalk..like "FUN" but it rarely is. It's like a big delivery route in reverse...I'm picking up stuff instead of dumping it off. Most of it is stuff that's valued by other people with different musical and cultural tastes. So, it's not just a frigging joyride thrift store excursion like you'd make on the weekend stopping for doughnuts or beers. I rarely find stuff I want. You HAVE to be disciplined in this putrid little racket. I want to begin writing about my post "Jobjumper" Ebay years. I've deliberately rarely written as much as I have here about it intentionally. I can't go on much longer dong this...but what the hell else is there?? I'm unhirable elsewhere..except at a business where the people in charge know me. I'm unhirable..unless I lie and pretend to be somebody I'm not which I can't do anymore. If I went to a job interview after intellectually going through what I had to go through to write "Jobjumper" I could only tell the truth..as the ol' bard said: "to thine own self be true". No wonder I've purchased 3 writing proposal books. It's the difficult but neccessary means of getting me to the next level as a writer $$$ wise. I have a lot of ideas..some fairly commerical..and am ready to dump this ebay horseshit and write my ass off. I might need to hire somebody to help me write the proposal letters..I'm not good at selling myself or anything. I was a born salesman...but the retail jobs and the door to door jobs STOMPED MY SOUL into the fucking muck. I can come up with paragraphs for proposals and ideas..and I've completed a few..but when I look at 'em on the screen I want to vomit for some reason. Ironically, there are lots of English majors trained and ready to write proposals....many of whom have no concrete idea what to write about. I guess it's time to try to hook up with one of these folks (If this sounds like you..get in touch).
Meanwhile, I'll be making the rounds between San Antonio and Austin.
I ran into a beautiful old hag of a Texas broad waiting in line today.
She elbowed me and said sagely "these bastards have their Halloween shit up ALREADY!! can you believe that!!"
I nodded and smiled..."yeah...why not hang the damned Christmas stuff up while their at it"!!
She cackled...which made her chin's waggle. Then she saw that the clerk ringing me up was yakking on a cell phone oblivious to us customers and our needs and opinons.
She looked me in the eye and lowered her voice a bit.."he don't give a goddamn anyway..he's too busy on that phone anyway to give a damn!!"
I love them old Texas gals.
08/29/04
I've been to New York City of course many times; I used to regularly set up as a dealer at a record show twice a year there for openers. I'd still be driving from here in Texas to work the show regularly if it weren't for one unpleant fact: NYC is goddamned EXPENSIVE to visit. How expensive?? Well, let's put it this way..there's no district with cheap motels in it like there probably is in your town. We always checked around for lodging deals..but we almost always wound up staying several miles away in New Jersey instead of the city and paying $90 per night. I heard a few dealers talking about a specific cheap hotel in the city that they stayed at for about the same money..but of course if you pick up the telephone and try to reserve a room you'll find that 99% of motels/hotels charge $125-250 per night for ordinary rooms unless there's some sort of big event taking place (like a convention for instance)...if so multiply those figures a couple times over.
Lodging expense is hardly your only problem when visiting the big apple. If you drive in you're gonna need a GODDAMNED PLACE TO PARK...and that can be difficult. We'd some times get VERY lucky and find meters we had to stuff with a couple bucks per hour of quarters..but usually we'd be very happy about shelling out $22 bucks or so to leave our vehicle in a lot during the hours of the record show..that's EACH DAY of course.
Of course if you don't want to be saddled down with a parking bill (and of course the $6 tunnel fee everytime you drive into the city..and about $10 of toll on the Jersey turnpike driving from 90 or so miles down the road) you can always fly into one of 3 inconveniently located airports and avoid paying for parking by paying for a bloody CAB from the airport (say $20-$25 or so minimum) and then shell out $5 per mile or so for cabs during your stay...IF you can get a cab...PLUS TIP of course. NYC has a lovely subway system that is priced reasonably...but you're gonna have to get into the city to use it.
I don't want to come off like I'm picking on NYC...yeah..it's an expensive proposition to go there..but the expense is not really out of line compared to visiting other great world class citieslike Tokyo, London or Paris. It really is a great place to visit..honestly.
Like I said earlier it's a good idea if you're on a budget to go during a non "peak" time unlike..AHEM..THIS week. The hotels are stuffed with Republican delegates..and you can bet they're charging the highest rates possible. The airports have to be a frigging nightmare all week..and of course a ticket would cost you the maximum amount. I think taxi's charge the same rate year round...but it could be damned hard to find one at many places at many times since the city is over flowing with humanity.
I think it's safe to say that a trip to the city this week including air fare, hotels, etc would run you a few thousand bucks.
Which leads me to the question that popped into my head as I watched the usual shocking footage of Republican convention protestors on CNN..
HOW CAN ALL THOSE PEOPLE AFFORD TO BE THERE???
If they can afford it..MORE POWER TO 'EM; they must be doing well..
(uhh..if they ARE doing that well under the Bush administration..what are they bellyaching about???)
What exactly are they saying that we don't hear regularly on the Sunday news discussion shows or on the cable news networks that justifies taking off time from work (for the unfortunate folk who are forced to) and taking an expensive trip to NYC during the worst week of the year to do so from a money standpoint
.
Well, let's see; the first group of protestors arrested were some folks who stripped naked publicly and DEMANDED that that cold hearted bastard Bush send money to 3rd world nations to deal with their Aids epidemics. A worthy cause no doubt. If memory serves me correct though, Bush publicly pledged on TV during a speech I watched a certain whopping figure. I read media accounts the next day that leaders from 3rd world nations present in the room instead of praising Bush's name and thanking Americans were upset he didn't pledge MORE though.
So....THAT was the highlight of those demonstrators week??
Why didn't they just take the money they spent on their trip...convert it into the form of a check...and hold a press conference next week in Ohio or wherever the hell they are from stating that they are sending the dough to their favorite 3rd world nation?? Now THAT would impress me.
Let's see.....according to the latest news reports protestors today chanted "GO HOME" to convention delegates.
Seems like a waste of breath to me. I doubt any delegates left the city..but if they did they'd simply be replaced wouldn't they??
Why would the protestors want to deny the delegates their place...THEIR VOICE representing folks back home??
Like I say..that seems like a weak chant to me.
Of course Michael Moore is there. The urgent message he shared with the throngs of protestors was (as usual) a familiar slimy half truth..that Bush wasn't elected by "popular vote"..OH BOY. I've only heard that one a jillion fucking times. The sad fact is I'm sure a lot of folks don't even realize the election is determined based on electoral college votes for a REASON. If he had suggested a new drive to specifically change that system constitutionally it would've been a new idea worth discussing. But, always the showman Moore must figure.....why waste an opportunity to bash Bush with a dull solution??
I just read another A.P. story with a list of causes being represented by various protest groups: immigrant rights, gay rights, universal health care, the Palestinian cause, an end to the killing in Sudan and of course "peace".
Wow..what a terrific roll call of causes.
CAUSES CAUSES CAUSES CAUSES CAUSES CAUSES.
A plethora of causes...cause-erooni..causes AU GO GO. Cause-d'jour.
How many words can you form out of the letters "C" "A" "U" "S" "E"???
Sea. Use. Us. Sac.....and so forth.
Of course the biggest "cause" being represented is that of foaming at the mouth HATRED for our President. Nothing new there; every President in my lifetime has been HATED by a goodly segment of society. In every case the President in question received billing as "worse ever".
To Bush haters, it must be a fucking blast to scream about his vile ways until their voices are shot. For that matter, the delegates and other attending Republican party members will enjoy their own overdose of cheering and clapping like hell.
As a pragmatic, killjoy Libertarian, I want to know one thing though...HOW IN THE HELL can all of those people afford to spend a week in New York City???
I remember seeing a little tent city of poor protestors in a park in Philly during the convention there. Ok. That accounts for the punk rock types who are driven around in buses to the demonstration of the week.
What about all the other folks???
It seems to me that the money would be better spent by keeping it in the home towns of the "cause oriented" activists...with the intent of "educating" local folks and in general applying the money spent on all these extravagant trips to NYC directly to the "Cause" whatever that may be. Seems to me that a fraction of the number of people present and protesting would get the same message out..which is being picked up by the media as pretty much the same, old familar causes and hatreds. If you took all the money spent by 90% of the cause oriented and applied it to the CAUSES...why...you'd save a few lives at the very least. And aren't we always hearing cause oriented people whine that their cause is worth any amount of money if it saves "just one life"??
If 50,000 protestors donated a couple thousand dollars each instead of squandering it to get to NYC...why that'd mean $100,000,000!!!!!! could be sent directly to the Sudan..or to new immigrants to the U.S. in South West border states. Hey..think of how many spotted owls on endangered pond larvae can be nurtured with a chunk of that hundred million?? HHMMM???
Of course I guess that means that a lot of cause oriented people would miss out on a vacation to New York city....but HELL; isn't their "cause" more important than their personal petty pleasures??
08/27/04
The newest vomit inducing set of commercials to really piss me off are for the on-line matchmaker service e-harmony.com (I'm not sure of the spelling...what the hell..I'm not worried about plugging their services). Before I ever was made aware of this outfit I heard some statistics that a huge percentage of internet users have tried seeking out love on the net.
If that's true....I guess people are even dumber than I've always figured...even though that hardly seems possible.
How dumb...uhh..change that to HOW DESPERATE and hardup can you be to trust total strangers out there in cyberland?? You have no fucking idea the agenda of ANYBODY communicating in chat rooms or lurking in the files at some lonely hearts club on the net. I myself have drunkenly waltzed about in a recovered alcoholics chat room just yukking it up..and occasionally disturbing people with a simple honest thought or two. If an upstanding guy like me will pick on defenseless sober fucks..think of the pieces of shit who'll say anything to ingratiate themselves with a mark for various reasons.
Remember the ugly bitch in the hair curlers who was portrayed on Beevis and Butthead as the sexy voiced phone sex honey??
Guys..that's YOUR sweetheart you've been warming up to in that chat room.
Gals..have you seen media coverage of the dude who kept those ladies locked up in his basement to rape 'em 2 hours per day..and preach the gospel to them as well?? That's what the guy who you shell out big bucks to the dating service to be paired off with is going to do to you...at the very least.
It's generally accepted that pedophile predators work chat rooms regularly and that's it's routine for kids to be approached by them.
Why can't adults wake up and smell the coffee and realize that not all nutcases are after kids?
You'd probably be safer working the restrooms at your local Greyhound bus station than flirting with some manipulative socio-path on the net.
Well...what the fuck. I'm gonna research the matter and write a column about it..likely for Carbon14 since I'm due to send 'em one.
Maybe I should try to actually get somebody to accept a marriage proposal from a charachter I invent...or perhaps agree to meet for a stroll on the beach..followed by wine and cheese..and HACKING THEIR FEET off with a machete. HAAAA!!! HAA!!
HEE HEE!!!
8/25/04
I am sick. I caught a virus that Marla suffered from last week and I should be in bed. I've taken a hit or two from a bottle of codeine and when I walk around the place I stagger enough that Mr. Jinx and Dixie can tell somethings up. I'll sure as hell fall further behind in answering email and mailing shit out now. Oh well.
I'm" inspired" though to go into further detail about the return of the students to San Marcos which is every bit as inevitable as the swallows returning to San Juan fucking Capistrano and the etched in stone sequel "return" of every really bad movie made these days.
I'm "inspired" because I drove and walked amongst the incoming students today which happened to be the first day of classes. I spotted several students walking home (poor sons of bitches indeed..walking!) from class. When I got to a busy intersection near the post office I was amazed how heavy traffic was. A wall of hundreds of shiny new vehicles was descending like Texas flood water always does down hill towards the town square. I began gazing at humanoid faces in automobiles..at first with a sense of curiosity..and then a sense of AWE. Most vehicles had at least three passengers; all were smiling..looking like they were rehearsing a part in a typical cheesy cross country "buddy" film. Their first day of classes was over..and they had found it to be easy as high school. Lots of hot looking fellow students everywhere..few rules compared to high school...and of course a few friends around to serve as a social security blanket.
In every vehicle..EVERY VEHICLE somebody was yakking on a cell phone..in many vehicles 2 or more were. If an alien had been there it would've logically concluded that a cell phone is part of the automobile structurally like the steering wheel and seat. Face after face I saw..dozens..scores..HUNDREDS in cars..all new and shiny gifts from well heeled parents..poured down the hill in front of me faces contorted into stylish sort of grins and expressions reflecting the Paris-Hilton-ization of American pop culture.
I saw several $40,000 trucks with incredibly expensive custom paint jobs burning rubber to attract attention..always a couple cap wearing frat boys draping arms out of the windows. I saw an open jeep sort of vehicle (brand new of course) with 3 centerfold caliber girls in it who with their gestures and seductive occasional little squeals appeared to be re-enacting every "dumb blond with rich parents" movie ever churned out by Hollywood.
Suddenly, the parade of pampered youth was over..and it was my turn to make my way around the corner and to the post office.
For a moment..just a fleeting few seconds maybe brought on by the codeine I suddenly realized WHY Americans are hated the world over.
If all Americans were as soft and unfettered with real worries I'd DEFECT; somewhere..don't ask me where.
My sad frown turned upside-down when I realized the TRUTH..which is that even though 98% of the spoiled rotten students who I had just seen buzz by me all think they're going to complete college and go on to great things...the truth is that by this November 1/'3rd of them will wash out..and by NEXT year on this day when the students "return" to San Marcos only about 1 out of 4 whom I saw today will be enrolled.
The advanced students I've met through Elvis and Mark and at the taverns I've drank at seem to actually have scholastic responsibilities they take seriously..and an occasion sobering sac o' woe to tote around.
I remember reading that Bin Laden attended an American university; NO WONDER he hates us..he probably only saw the elite, privileged types with wealthy parents and lots of support from surfeited frat Brothers and Sorority cunts.
As inevitably as the students and the swallows and the "polar bear club" dipping into a frozen lake every new years day..it is inevitable that many of the quieter, less flashy students who have to walk to class and travel home in a common bus to visit their family on occasion will SUCCEED and go on to great things in the real world whilst the college babes and studs and athletes who suffer serious injuries wind up trying to figure out their next move when they WASH OUT of school.
So many of the spoiled brats I saw today lording their way around the campus as if they were still in high school are on a collision course with REALITY. In just a few years lots of the guys will start packing light guts...and learn that their high school athletic accomplishments mean NOTHING to the "real world". Their party animal boyish ways will gradually, but INEVITABLY be received with less and less enthusiasm. They'll find themselves no longer lording over "geeks" and "nerds"..hell..those are the guys who are in many cases going to be their BOSSES.
The pretty girls are wonderful to look at, no doubt. They strut through the H.E.B. grocery store in groups showing off lots of perfect skin, perfect hair..like royalty. Sadly for them like sand through an hourglass so goes their beauty and youth. As their looks go and their academic quest ends..many of them will wind up scrambling to marry the washed up jocks..who will be happy to settle for insurance sales jobs. Some of them will wind up happy...but most of them will feel disappointed that something, somehow, somewhere along the way went wrong.
The "lowly" humble students have been conditioned by the time they enroll in college to learn how to roll with the punches and realities of life. Walking to school while all the prettyboys and girls drive past you in carloads in a caravan that resembles something out of an MTV reality series can have an oddly positive effect on them and in some cases prepare them for great things.
Don't get me wrong. I probably prefer to live in a college town and look at snappy little coed butts at the grocery store as opposed to what I've had to live with in other cities. The privileged students don't fuck with me..on the contrary..they grin at me in line at the liquor store like I'm Bluto from animal house grown-up. Sometimes I'll turn to a group of them buying a 12 pack of light beer (??) and say something like.."HEY! I drank that much driving over here!!". They always laugh good naturedly.
Maybe I should start a counseling service to help sinking students learn to adjust to the disappointments and realities ahead?? There oughta be some way for a philosopher like me to capitalize off of 'em.
8/23/04
Hey, I'm not such a stubborn ass that I can't change horses in mid-stream when it comes to a wrestling angle. I believe I bitched a few weeks ago about WWE's angle with Kane and Lita. I thought Kane's work tonight especially (and Lita's too to an extent ) during the wedding was fantastic. His expressions were fucking priceless. He knows that Lita hates his guts...and whenever she reminds him of the fact he gets pissed off for a few seconds...but then he starts chuckling in a really jolly, ugly, incorrect..dare I say demonic way. I'd be surprised if the two of them aren't a happy, twisted couple swapping spit and punishing everybody in sight very soon. Lita will LEARN that Kane's hatred of humanity is the ONLY way..
Randy Orton blowing spit in triple ZZZ's face tonight was also great. He's fucking great..easily as good as Piper age 24. I'm glad they've commited to HIM being "the future". He's better than Lesner (who I liked) and way the fuck beyond Goldberg (I thought he was rather one dimensional) and clearly he's advanced beyond John Cena (also a fine guy to look forward to watching for many years..in spite of his wigger act). Randy Orton is being thrown into the spotlight..maybe sooner than he ever expected. I think he's got what it takes to pull it off. Remember, he's a 3rd generation wrestler goddamnit. I officially recommend that people who have tuned WWE out for whatever reason give it a try again. With the exception of the horrid "diva search" malarky they're trying really hard to entertain.
Oh yeah..Ric Flair vs. William Regal....it actually took place tonight on TV...and a decent amount of time was alotted for the match. You KNOW it was good...even though Regal is just back from an injury and Flair is 55 years old and is probably working 110 hour weeks promoting his book.
In local San Marcos news..the students are back. Of course most of them are clueless Freshmen..and they out number the other students probably 4 to 1 at least. The attrition rate is unbelievable. Even considering the thousands and thousands of apartment units in town..by November it'll be very easy to get an apartment here. Obviously the demands of a college education are hard to live up to.
I did piss poor academically my first year in college at University of Oregon in 1975. I had to work to support myself though..a bit too many hours I always thought. I didn't get a free ride..only a partial ride from my parents.
I'm still very proud of my personal record for meeting absolutely NO NEW FRIENDS that academic year. I did indeed lose a few friends I knew from Beaverton high school. That's GOOD...I've never missed them.
All the students on the surface around here seem to be buddy buddy with one another..of course that's a false impression. There must be a lot of loser's around here. I wish them well. UURRRPPP. There's not much I can do to help 'em except let 'em buy me a damned beer at the Showdown or the Triple Crown. BBRRAPPPPP...hopefully with Daddy and Mommy's money. It'll taste all that much better.
Oh yeah. One more thought for the day. If you don't want your "holy shrine" pock marked by bombs or worse..don't hide behind its walls. GET THE FUCK OUT and somewhere else...anywhere else..if you REALLY value your fucking shrine. That should be obvious. If I held Marla up by the throat in front of me to block the attack someone with a gun and she got shot.....it'd be largely MY fault for dragging her into the fray.
I have near zero respect for Christian churches and holy sites..and no more for Muslim faith sacred digs. No matter which side you support in the squabble in Najaf...it seems moronic and hypocritical for Al Sadr to drag his troops to hide in a holy spot. Take the fight somewhere else...you attention seeking preacher-fuck.
Let's bomb the Vatican while we're at it as far as I'm concerned.
8/19/04
What a strange fucking thrift store I visited today for the first time. It was in an upscale suburb near the edge of Austin that could have passed for..based simply on the look of the retail establishments architechtural design..either Bellevue Washington, Bryn Mawr (sp?) in suburban Philly or Thousand Oaks California.
It was a Goodwill outlet...my favorite non-profit chain whose stores I've visited from Fairbanks Alaska to West Palm Beach Florida; from Brunswick New Jersey to San Diego California over the last 20+ years. The building it was housed in had been custom built unlike most Goodwill stores that appear to have taken up residence in abandoned shops, airplane hangers and wearhouses. The parking lot was spacious and clean. There was no eye-sore donation box..but instead a seperate building with it's own parking area.
I strolled through the door..and caught myself wiping my feet on the plush door mat. The clerks weren't the slow moving 'tards, handicapped folk, or rehab projects like virtually 95% of thrift store clerks I've been forced to endure for so many, many years. Nope. They were youthful, robust, had healthy complexions and actually appeared to be turning the tables on me by looking down their noses at my scruffy Whiskey Rebel-wear. I felt self conscious about the huge tear in my vest...and the holes in my Limecell T-shirt I was wearing.
I made haste to the back of the store where the vinyl and CD's were. I was overwhelmed by the plethora of bad, BAD Christian vinyl offerings. You usually see a few dozen in any thrift store, but this place looked like the music annex of a Christian book store. Piles and piles of donated LP's covering the last 40 years by god squaders ranging from Amy Grant to Bill Gaither to Jimmy Swaggert to the frigging Pope (one of 'em that is). I managed to salvage a twin hammond organ LP from 1960 or so..a copy of the "Alley cat" LP by Acker Bilk a Johnny Rodriguez selection and an album by a blues guy from El Paso. Sheesh..even the "Mama's and the Papa's" would seem sinful next to records like those.
There were NO sinful records to be found though..no scratchy copies of "Iron Butterfly" LP's.. no "tusk" by Fleetwood Mac no "Frampton comes alive" and absolutely not ONE single album that looked like it might be related to any aggressive form of rock and roll, hip hop, rap or adult comedy.
I might add, there were NO Michael Jackson LP's..which confirmed for SURE that somebody has been intentionally pulling out any "unsavory" albums by the standards of this rich bitch community.
I've always LOATHED white bread suburban ghetto's like that. I'm always happy and content shopping in "bad" neighborhoods with gracefully filthy parking lots and bedraggled clerks whose lives have been shattered by a taste for crank or perhaps dealt a bad hand of genes at birth along with a taste for fortified wine.
Even mental deficients who've sniffed a bit too much glue are more interesting and fun to deal with than sober white kids who've never experienced a bigger problem than a zit at an akward time.
I doubt I'll visit that store again very often. Then again..I am sort of a masochist socially speaking. Maybe I'll be mysteriously drawn to that fucking place. Maybe I am just a glutton for psychic punishment. Pass the Heinz steak sauce....UUURRRPPPPPPP.
8/16/04
I disagree with a helluva lot of the opinonated columns I read at internet wrestling websites. Lately though I've found myself in agreement with all the geeks expressing their dislike for the WWE "diva-search" competition.
First off, C'MON VINCE...the very word "diva" has been BEATEN TO DEATH and applied to so many women in so many situations ranging from gospel music singers to porn Queens it's no longer special..to use it suggests that a mediocre, uncreative team of writers can't come up with anything fresh and new.
Hey, I've got an idea!! Since the WWE's "diva's" can be slotted into two categories: 1) bimbo's with zero knowledge of the biz but nice tits and asses and 2) mere "attractive" ladies with mammoth boob jobs who can actually work in the ring...why not call the ladies who wrestle...FEMALE WRESTLERS????? HHmmmmm????? And hey...assign the bimbo's to escort certain wrestlers to the ring as eye candy. They could peel the wrestlers robe off in a sensuous manner..and then carry it back stage..all the while..KEEPING THEIR BLOODY TRAPS SHUT.
The "diva search" for those who've already given up on the WWE is a long, L-O-N-G contest designed to locate a "diva" that will be given $250,000 and a job on the rost. Week after week after week after week after week a large number of apparently braindead babes compete in front of the camera wiggling around in bikini's using the same old dancing in place steps..occasionally breaking out with a predictable "loose-cannon" gesture.
Judging by the crowd reactions I've heard on my TV which every week range from bored to outright pissed....it doesn't seem like this contest is going over well. The internet "experts" (huh huh) too are for once unanimous in their hatred of this angle. I hate it too.
I think the problem is the "diva" candidates selected all OOZE that phoney, cold, soul-less "Britney" look. They look UNATTAINABLE. The clothing that they peel off is shed at a uniform, predictable time. Most of the time they speak in a sing-sing cheerleader "full of pep" manner that is about as much of a turn-on as hearing your Grandma talk about her bunions.
I've attended a few wrestling cards in my time..including many classic nights at the now defunct ECW arena. What the typical wrestling fan is turned on by during a night of wrestling is seeing a valet or female manager "accidently" reveal her ass or "assets" climbing between the ring ropes. It's for damn sure that guys don't wait in line for hours and shell out a lot of dough for tickets to see a parade of models more suited to a frigging fashion show. They go their to watch WRESTLING.
With zillions of internet porn sites available to most American males and strip clubs in most States, they sure as hell don't want to see a long drawn out passion play week after week performed by spoiled looking bitches who look and jabber like the cheerleaders that wouldn't give 'em the time of day back in high school.
The guys that DO want to watch that sort of stuff already watch Baywatch re-runs or the Soap Opera channel...they AREN'T wrestling fans.
I've enjoyed watching plenty of female wrestlers over the years including American's like Luna Vachon, the Fabulous Moolah, Chyna and Sherri Martel and Japanese girls whose names I never get straight but whose work (which I've seen on VHS tape only) is often BETTER than main event wrestlers on TV in this country today.
Thee Whiskey Rebel LOVES lady wrestlers....
But he HATES "Diva's" ..and he hates the All-American notion that some stuck up cunt with a "perfect" look is somehow better than the 98% of " natural" women with ordinary flaws.
With all due respect...."Sable" was never my "type". She just seemed COLD..and like I said before...."unattainable" for the lack of a better word.
On the other hand "Sunny" a.k.a. Tammy Lynn Sytch (married to the lucky Chris Candido) seemed warm and HUMAN..and of course ultra sexy. She was also an accomplished manager who did all the sneaky things wrestling managers did..before they vanished in favor of lingerie matches and dodge ball games as performed by "divas'".
Incidentally, I don't want to tar all the WWE females with the same "diva" brush. I think ring announcer Lillian Garcia (sp?) comports herself well for example. It's insulting to denegrate the ring talents of Lita, Gail Kim, Molly and several others (including my favorite "Miss Texas" Jacqueline) by presenting them as "diva's" alongside ladies who can't "work". Somewhere along the way in the WWE the fine line between women who can WRESTLE and women who only pretend to wrestle was deliberately clouded. I don't like that.
DAMN!!!! If you don't understand why I'm bitching about "diva's" tune into a WWE program and see what I mean. The acting is SO bad..the dialogue sounds SO forced; these gals make porn stars sound like gifted thespians.
It's all part of the "Paris-Hilton-ization" of America.
BBRRAAAPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Politcal thought of the day. Today for some reason when I was shopping for a bottle of "Worcestershire sauce" (sp?) I grabbed a bottle of French's instead of Heinz. I don't usually do that..but after seeing Mrs. Kerry on TV I felt like I HAD to.
I came home and told Marla about it..and she told me she deliberately bought "Hunts" catsup for the same reason.
Damn...it's not like we go around boycotting products. She just seems like SUCH a cunt. I'd rather listen to the pope read a frigging mass than listen to her pontificate on all the good work to be done for the benefit of incapable, lower class folk. A true "society diva".
BBRRRRRRAAAPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!
8/11/04
Yep..that's right. As you can see by the new scan appearing at the top of this page, we've finally gotten off of our fannies and had some A.U. shirts made up. They are available for $10 for Large and XL....and $12 for XXL (sorry all you fellow full figure drunks..they cost us more at the shirt printing shop).
ADD $3.85 for shipping in the U.S. or to Canada!!!!!! Send cash, check or M.O. to Phil Irwin c/o brilliancy prize records P.O.Box 1781 San Marcos, Tx. 78666 If you have a Paypal account you can "pay" me by paying the following email address at Paypal's site: whskyreb@centurytel.net If you don't have a Paypal account..START ONE. It's easy.
Over the years since A.U. began in the late 80's we've sold a lot of different T-shirts. Part of the charm in wearing the damned things is you don't even have to know that there is a band known as Alcoholics Unanimous to love the hell out of the shirts. How can you go wrong with a garment that declares the wearer a proud member of the "Alcoholics Unanimous drinking team". Over the years people have regularly bought A.U. shirts for parents and non-music oriented boozehound friends from us. To be quite frank, even though a lot of people we know seem to treat A.U. as some sort of "side project" of Rancid Vat...A.U. has always been a much more successful band in terms of selling CD's and records. The Ego's belonging to our Rancid Vat bandmates have always been too huge for me to ever reveal this truth to them..until now I guess in several cases.
Not only has A.U. consistently outsold the Vat "units" wise by a large margin..it's always been a much easier band to book at clubs. It should be obvious why...R.V. was designed to piss off people..A.U. has always played 100% drinking songs and presented them in a boozy/friendly manner. My Mother used to babble some sort of old adage about flies and honey and vinegar....you see what I mean.
If I hadn't been in a band that fucked with people live for several years I couldn't have started up A.U. without feeling a bit like a jolly fool. It's O.K....for me to be a jolly fool and play drinking songs for people to enjoy..since I've already gotten my aggessions out on another stage with another band.
We're launching the 1st Texas chapter of A.U. very soon. I'm not ready to reveal plans to anybody who isn't an insider quite yet. If you are..consider yourself lucky and email me for details if you're interested.
Incidentaly, we're making up a couple different Rancid Vat T-shirts next
It's time for a Whiskey Rebel T-shirt too I'd say...HHHMMM?????
Summer is officially here..a great time for beer drinking games that influence inordinant amounts of chug-a-lugging. Elvis and I worked up the best one we've come up with in a long time the other night. We were playing EA Sports 2004 baseball game for Play Station 2. We started drinking beers slowly about 2:00 am or so. Oddly enough there was no whiskey to be found in the house..we were gonna have to make it with beer.
The team we manage together is a mixture of current Red Sox (we're big fans of 'em in "real life") and legends from the past whom we have unlocked and added to the lineup. The pitching staff is mostly current guys..with the exception of Walter Johnson. We've also got Babe Ruth, Pee Wee Reese, Mike Schmidt and fellow Oregonian (by birth..I couldn't choose the State I was born in) Harmon Killebrew..a big stocky slugger..one of my boyhood favorites.
Some how we reached a point where we agreed that every time that night that Harm' clouted a home run..we'd literally "Kill-A-Brew" on the spot. It seemed more like a tribute to the killer than anything. Yeah..I remember the remark was made "what if he goes on a rampage?? will we keep up the pace and chug 'em as fast as he can swat 'em out of Fenway park"??
Wouldn't you know it. He went on a frigging tear; he began clobbering homers left and right..and we laughed our asses off and drained cans. Eventually we started going through a lot of Busch beer. It's not that easy to get beer drunk for us. Elvis is usually a rum drinker. I usually drink shots with my beer. But, we started getting nice and looped. Marla got up and left for work at 6:00 am or so..and we were still "Killing-Brews" with Ontario Oregon's finest export. The sun rose and as our neighbors were enjoying their cornflakes we were watching the beer supply diminish.
Eventually we got so tanked we were sucking down entire cans when other players homered. Shit..Mike Schimdt hit 4 in one game!!!! The end result was we managed to kill off every beer in the house..a rare Irwin feat..since I always stock up heavily with lots of backup. I was tempted to march to the convenience store...but at 9:00 am or so we trundled off to the sack.
Looking back on it..we realized we don't remember whether Nomar Garciapara hit for the cycle..or was left in a bloody injured state on the turf. We're about to play a few more games..and the "kill-a-brew" rule will be enforced.
Play Station advertising motto is: "live in your world..play in ours". I think we'll amend that to: "drink in YOUR world..but be ready to "kill-a-brew" if you're ever invited over on a night/morning that we're kicing ass and taking names with our Red Sox.
visit WhiskeyRebel.com for more info
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