This is a very "melancholy morning"... A rather symbolic incident happened as I was cooking breakfast... I told you I was feeling subdued and pensive this morning... partly due to this the Anniversary of [J]'s death... While I was cooking the scrambled eggs, I saw my brother [J] standing before me... He was just grining from ear to ear and his eyes bright blue and just shining... He told me that he was very happy now, he spends lots of time with Daddy, Granham and Grandpa and cousin [S]... [S] and [J] hang out together a lot... He has messages from everyone... First he said that [B] and I are doing a great job with the kids' except for a few subtle suggestions... One, go easy on the children, be gentle with the children, this came from my Grandmother [HM]... I could almost hear her voice as [J] was telling me... He said [R] is turning out to be so beautiful and her health will continue to improve... He said you've done a great job [P] and [B]... My Daddy sent a message about our situation... he said just be patient as I know this is not your strongest suit... Everything is working out for the best... Keep a very close eye on [B]... [J] said they are all watching us and monitoring what is happening in our lives... He said if we don't be more kinder and gentler to the children, there will be some major butt kicking... We need to keep a tighter reign on [T], get [E]'s temper under control, let [R] have her wings so she can fly... He said we have given her much more freedom than before and this makes him very happy... [J] had kind of shortish reddish brown hair, was in his 30's looking very very young... He had on loose white pants and a long white shirt... He acted just like he did when he was alive, carefree and a free spirit... He wanted me to know that he is so happy now and I am not to feel badly about his leaving... the tears just streamed down my face as I was cooking the eggs... luckily I turned the burner down just as this was starting to happen... This was not a vision but something that really happened to me... I could HEAR [J] and SEE [J] and could FEEL his presence... I have seen my Daddy, Grandpa and Grandma at various other times... sometimes if I didn't see them I HEARD them talking to me... "WHISPERS"... [B] said to tell you that this was not an imaginary thing that happened... very much REAL and so NEAT to happen on this 4th Anniversay of [J]'s leaving us... This is a release for me and another wall to come down... I've got goosebumps all over me again... felt the same way earlier when I saw [J] this morning...